Stop Shaming Black Men and Black Unions: Learn to Rejoice When We Unite
When the kiss cam flew above the audience of an Atlanta Hawks game Tuesday November 22, 2016 couples did as they usually do. They look at each other in surprise after recognizing themselves on
the screen and then kiss. However, this Tuesday night one couple shocked us. Keyshia Ka’oir covered her mouth in surprise before turning towards Gucci Mane, who was smiling from ear to ear. She went for his chin but he stood up and turned towards her to present a black box with a beautiful 25 carat engagement ring shining inside. The Hawk mascot brought her up a bouquet of roses as crowds of people behind them tried to capture the moment with their smartphones, as announcer states, “That ring says ‘Burr!'”.
When I watched the wedding proposal my heart melted did yours? Some people on social media were critical.
An important fulfillment of purpose for a man is to choose his wife, but Black men have been socialized to believe otherwise, that their worth is in their body count in women or casualties. Rather than find success in being a supporter and a provider for his family, their role is devalued to senseless violence. Being a thug or a criminal is normalized, and even glorified, to an acceptable form of manhood in the Black community. We can see this in our music, movies, and even in our daily lives where we excuse of even praise our men for destructive behavior. Until we place value into serving each other than our community will never grow. So long as we continue to degrade the roles we must serve in our community, the entire community will deteriorate.
When destructive behavior is normalized that has a negative effect on how we perceive constructive behavior. This is why when Gucci Mane proposed to Keyshia Ka’oir at Tuesday night’s Hawks game in Atlanta people couldn’t help but criticize and ‘throw shade’. 
Why do black marriage proposals receive high negative responses from our own community?
Instead of pointing out what looks unsatisfactory or unpleasant in one’s eyes when looking onto a wedding proposal, we should all be providing positive energy towards this union. The union of a Black couple is a success for our community, it means that we will grow. People, stop Shaming Gucci Mane for His Wedding Proposal. There who some who pointed out that he did not get down on one knee when presenting the ring. Others argued that the arena floors were littered with trash in defense of his white pants. Regardless of the reason why he chose not to get down on one knee the fact that some of us have chosen to focus on that aspect instead of the proposal is sad. 
Why are we defending this ‘tradition’ over expressing delight for the couple? Where did this tradition come from that we would hold so dear that we would shame a man making the most important decision of his life, choosing his wife. In European culture knights bent down before being knighted. Catholics bent down one knee before the tabernacle to show respect. In relationship to religion, Jesus’ wife was the church, he was married to the church (Ephesians 5:22-32). The origin of the tradition of a man bending down on one knee to propose is lost. We we’ve seen with many traditions in Western culture like celebrating Thanksgiving, practicing empty customs can be destructive. Whether a man is willing and able to bend down on one knee during is his wedding proposal or not we should celebrate the decision he’s made choosing a beautiful wife. Congratulations Gucci Mane and Keyshia Ka’oir, may your forever be filled with love and happiness! 
